Sorry, Mom and Boris, but clowns are creepy.

Fuck clowns.

Doorway to the observation deck

Nice couple

These guys were dancing(?) to some of the worst music imaginable. This is a very common scene in Put-In-Bay.

Top of the memorial

View from atop Perry's Memorial

OH YES.

How about this fine mullet specimen? He was wavin' that mane all over the bar, breaking white trash girls hearts with every flick of that long, silky plumage.

Could I be more emphatic?

FUCK Guinness in a plastic cup.

Um....

Kim: (yelling) "I LOVE THIS FUCKING PLACE!"
Heidi: "Captain Buck? Why does it smell like piss on your bus?"

Kim?

Are 48 beers really enough for two days?

Chrissy (shut the fuck up!)

What we wouldn't give for that toy to be a voodoo doll. Oh, whiskey, you are the devil!

Disaster Area

Aftermath of Katrina? Nope. Um, if my room looked like this when I was 12, my Dad would've grounded me for three weeks.

The late Maxine Pad

Poor little hamster. You never had a chance. I never blamed you for biting every finger offered you, because I know what that damned cage smelled like. Rest in peace.

Wow.

This car was sitting in the parking space next to mine one day when I went to pick up the mail.

No! No Parking

As fate would have it, the Knotty Pine is located directly across the street from an AA Meeting. Problem is, they seem to want to park in Pete's lot. This is not cool with Pete at all, and so he fashioned this beautiful, direct and magical sign that fends all 12-steppers away. Cheers!

One of Kim's co-workers

Yeah, he smokes a pipe - AND listens to the Cramps. Yes, you heard me. A pipe-smoking, Cramps-loving ACCOUNTANT.

Pete

Here's Pete in an action shot, cracking a beer for Kim before he goes out into the cold to retrieve his 'No, No Parking!' sign from the lot. I'll be posting a shot of the aforementioned sign soon, along with the story behind it.

Kim and I always forget this guy's name

He's the best. That's HIS seat, my friend. Don't ever forget it. Plus, he always watches us leave and makes sure we make it to our car safely. Whatever your name is, we love you.

On the long hike back up to camp

Blurry.

LeCock Brand Hot Dogs

My friend Jake, who at the moment lives in Sicily, took a picture of these wonderfully delicious hot dogs. They are considered a delicacy in many exclusive gourmet groceries in the U.S., but as it turns out, even housecats will not eat them. No accounting for taste...