In no uncertain terms...

My Mom knows I'm completely full of shit.

Key

Keyosha and I met when she and her husband came to stay with my friend Bekki and her husband. Bekki's husband's brother Dusty is Key's husband. Key is the biggest flirt I've ever known in my life. She's shameless in the absolute best way, welcoming any opportunity to make a spectacle of herself for everyone's enjoyment. Her wheels were just about shot off at this particular moment, singing along to the jukebox with an unplugged PA mic. Key hearts country music, real hard.

Passed out

I love Rocky.

H Door at the Hideaway Lounge

This bar sucked. It looked promising because of the door, but we got inside and realized immediately we'd been duped. Douchebag central.

Swabby

In order to make ends meet, I've had to take on a second job as a janitor. It's hard work, but they let me smoke. Golden.

I don't think it's just the sunglasses.

Kim: One hot bitch.

Framed dork

Take out container of shit or melted chocolate cake?

This was one of the most disgusting things I have ever seen.

Last trip to the 'Pine before being grounded

We were having so much fun, too. What a drag.

Mark is a huge pussy.

Drinking bottled water at the Knotty Pine. Mark is a huge pussy.

High five, Jesus-hands!

We found this gem in someone's backyard in Massillon. The hands really do it for me.

Ziegler Follies Dancer?

I spotted this guy at the annual Massillon Cruise Night.

Smiley's

Smiley's is a really cheap, cool little Italian Restaurant in Massillon that we like a lot. It isn't run by Italians, though. They're all Armenian. But they make great pizza, and it's ridiculously cheap. A large (which is huge) costs 9 bucks and some change.

My friend Mark, who lives in Massillon, told me a story about going into Smiley's one night to pick up a pizza. While waiting in line to pay for the pie, a kid comes in and rolls up to the counter. He and the guy at the cash register start going back and forth, ending up loudly saying "fuck you!" several times to each other. Smiley, the owner, comes out from the back and in his thick accent says, "hey! hey! no one's gonna fuck anybody!"

Getting rid of junk

Bekki's neighborhood has a yearly "we'll pick up anything" trash day. This bike, which never got any use was one of the treasures that ended up being pitched. The bike was Bekki's husband's, and I took a pic of him brandishing it with pride before he was forced to release it. Poor bastard.

gotta haircut